First, I want to let you know the Lord is my rock and my foundation.  Without him, I would be lost.

This is the one year anniversary of the loss of my son, Brenden, as I knew him.  There have been some very difficult and emotional times through this tragedy.

So why am I happy, emotionally and physically healthy?  The most significant and life-changing ”Aha” I have had this year stemmed from my most difficult life experience.

Andy Worhol said it perfectly - “They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.”

I call this “going for the white space.”  I’ll give you a visual - imagine a small circle, completely filled in with darkness.  This is the pain you feel when you have a great loss.  This pain will always be there.  If one is to truly move forward and have joy in their life, they must expand the circle.  As the circle expands, the darkness remains stable, not growing in size, thus creating white space between the boundaries of the old circle and the new one.  This white space is the happiness you create as you expand your life in pursuit of happiness and fulfillment.  It won’t come to you - you must “go for the white space.”

What makes you happy?  Are you living in mediocrity? Are you settling for less than you deserve?  Only you know and only you can change it.

I could list 100 things I have purposefully improved over the past year.  I’m excited to have wonderful relationships with my two healthy grown sons and I am proud of the things they are accomplishing as they go for their own “white space.”

I am happy, healthy and soon to be officially single.  I’m going for the “white space!”  Will you?